Second Round
Blah! I’m not in a bad mood today…but I’m not in a great one either…FG is gone today so our office is really quiet…Deedee is in the other room so unless I roll my chair all the way across the room, I’m pretty much talking to myself today. It’s not that big of a deal I guess, I just have a lot of words that are being pent up right now.
Not even like the words have any specific need to come out except that I’m female and apparently that entitles me to twice as many words as my guy friends use…Today is one of those days I’d really like to make use of all the words I’m allotted…I hate that feeling because it makes me feel girly (as in I’m ruled by my emotions, not as in I feel feminine.) Maybe I’m just pms-ing I sure hope that’s what it is…that would be a good explanation…let’s go with that for the time being.
So last night I had fire cadets…we did the second half of their introduction to Wildland firefighting…it was fun…and the kids had a blast…we had two guest instructors come in…Johnny Bravo and Daniel…sigh…
Daniel is still one of the most beautiful men I’ve ever known…I am so glad we worked through all of our shit a few years ago so that we can be friends now…that’s really important to me. He got hired in the latest batch of rookies to come through the fire department…he came to us from another department an before that he fought wildland for three years…this department was always his dream though, and since he is a fantastic firefighter and human being, I am very happy for him.
Anyway, I’m not just droning on about Daniel for no reason…I worked with him last night…and one of the things we had him do was tell the kids about some of his experiences fighting forest fires… he’s got some great survival stories…which actually at the root of what I’m writing…
See I’ve heard the story more time than I can count in the almost five years since it happened but every time I hear it…well it still pulls at my heart a little…by all logic and reason, Daniel shouldn’t be alive to be here to stand in front of me and tease me…
There was a huge forest fire up here in Northern California about five years ago, it lasted for over three weeks and it burned upwards of 52,000 acres of forests and homes…Daniel and his crew were in the midst of it, as were many of my other good friends and my family…Anyway, Daniel was with his forestry crew protecting some houses in the midst of the foothills…
They were trying to evacuate people who refused to cooperate and ended up staying longer protecting the structures than was safe for them…they had a “Safe” area about a half mile from where they were, but the wind shifted directions and brought the fire around so quickly that it blocked their path out…they ended up having to deploy their “shake and bakes”. Those are portable fire shelters, called shake and bakes by firefighters because all the shelters are is space age insulated tin foil…they are thin and flimsy looking…but they protect you one time in the event of a burn over…a burn over is literally where the fire comes right over the top of you…
Well, Daniel and his crew were caught in two…the shake and bakes are only rated for one burning and theirs survived two…when the fire rolled past enough for them to get out, the shelters looked like tin foil does after you’ve thrown it into the camp fire…Daniel got some minor burns on his arms and one of his crew members burned his leg…but they survived…their engine got scorched and for a while the crew was declared missing…no one thought they could make it out of that area alive…
I still remember hearing the news…and my heart dropped…even though they didn’t say what crew or what had happened, I remember knowing deep down that it involved someone I cared about…then the call came from my dad…he was out on that fire too…he told me that he had talked to Daniel…that it had been him in the burn overs and that whatever shit Daniel and I had between us, we needed to work it out…enough was enough…
When Daniel came home after the fire season, he taught a Wild land safety class to the career guys at the department…they asked me if I wanted to sit in and hear his story first hand (they all knew our confusing and complicated history) so at Daniel’s request I sat in on the class…he asked me to stay through all of them…so for three hours I listened to him tell over and over again about how he almost died…all the residual anger went away by that point, I was so thankful that he was still alive and more than that…he still loved being a firefighter…
After he was done teaching, he and I sat down and talked out ALL of the drama…and it was good for both of us…Since then we have remained friends, and while there is a connection there, the love that is there is one of camaraderie and not romance…and honestly I can’t think of a better ending to that chapter of my life…
It was good to see Daniel last night…and while all the feelings from “way back when” are long gone…I can still appreciate that Daniel is still here and just as beautiful as ever…
posted by Audrey @ 1:11 PM
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