Thursday, February 02, 2006

End of the Ride

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this is an audio post - click to play

A good friend told me not too long ago: "Maya Angelou said, When someone shows you who they are...believe them." She was talking about him but she was also talking about you.

You showed me time and time again who you are...I refused to believe. I know you. In many ways I know you better than you know yourself...I always have...in some ways you know me better than I do.

I tried everything I could think of to keep the beasts away. I sacrificed; I worked; I pleaded. I did everything you asked and many things you couldn't bring yourself to voice. You never needed to because I already understood.

You lost sight of me somewhere along the way...I never left your side but somehow I drifted into the blind spot in your soul. We got lost in the maze...the reasons are immaterial.

You said you had lost faith; I told you that I had enough faith for both of us. You said you were lost; I told you I would find you the way you had found me. You said that we had forever; I said I would wait.

For two years you have circled in close, only to run at the first sight of me. So, for two years, we have played shadow games...neither one of us able to get too close. You said you were afraid to hurt. I said I already knew the pain of loss.

The last time, I told you not to come back unless you could stay. I said that the carousel had to come to a halt. You had to either stay for the duration of the ride or you had to walk away. I let the decision be yours...you said it had to be. I agreed with you, as long as you understood that you couldn't have both.

You say you want a love for the centuries...you had one. You say you want someone who resides in your soul...you found her. You asked if this love could last. I told you that love this deep doesn't fade; sometimes it has to change, but it never disappears.

You ask me to show you who I am...I have...I always have. Maybe now you'll believe me.