It's Monday Again!!
It’s Monday again…that’s not a bad thing…it’s just an “is” thing. I heard from the tour logistics people in San Diego…it’s a no-go. That’s ok actually…I would have loved to work for them but it’s ok…I know that there is still a lot of things I want to do here…and honestly, as cool as that job would have been, it would have uprooted every other aspect of my life…and some parts are still being worked out…
Yes that is indeed a segue way to my update…as some of you know or may have surmised… Clark is back in my life. I am moving very slowly…and neither of us have all the answers yet…and while I know many of you have serious reservations, I know that this is something I must do for me.
He and I have talked through a lot of different things…many things that neither one of us had tackled before so, we are trying…only time will tell and I know that…he does too, so we shall see.
I received an email from a dear friend on Friday that encapsulated everything I feel and I am so thankful that she is more eloquent than I…I could never have written these words as well as she does…so to the Fantastic Miss Joan…thank you ever so much. Your words truly calmed my spirit:
People who have never been there, can't comprehend a love that would allow you to literally put someone else's well-being and happiness above your own... We can say all we like that "I wouldn't put up with this, or that..." but when you truly love someone in that eternal way, there are no limitations to that love. Good and bad… But it's a rollercoaster...you have to have some really earth-shatteringly low valleys in order to hit the highest peaks… Sometimes you just have to close your eyes and jump...hoping that hand will reach out to you in the darkness. Everything is going to be fine between you and Clark. I have faith. There are some loves that are just meant to be.
I believe that to be the truth…so that is what I am choosing to do. I am at peace with whatever happens or doesn’t…I have always known that on some level Clark would always be a presence in my life regardless of our “relationship” status.
posted by Audrey @ 11:19 AM
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